Four Loko Stories
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Loco por vida: After hearing all the hub-bub about this "blackout in a can" I felt compelled to try this stuff out. I went and bought four of the grape flavor. Looked innocent enough..but that first drink..OMFG..It was like drinking gamma rays laced with cough syrup. Just awful. Being the true drunkard I am I proceeded to drink 3 of them. Feeling the rush of energy coursing through my body I got antsy,and jumpy. Finished the last one & then went to a bar with friends..when I showed up The people around me kept asking me for coke...I was that jacked. A few pitchers/shots and a few poorly done karaoke songs later..I woke up in bed with a bunch of cuts on both hands, my face covered in blood/vomit and fully dressed. My phone was going craaaazy. My head felt like it was split with a dull tomahawk..I try to leave to get something to eat and my car is not there. Great..maybe I will check my phone now. Several angry text/voice messages later and I come to find out I didnt quietly leave the bar after singing two karaoke songs..Thats just when I blacked out. From second hand stories I guess i was heckling some other karaoke singers when some guy tried to start a fight with me...I guess I punched him out, spit on his girlfriend..threw a few bar stools..started fighting the bouncers..getting thrown outside in the parking lot onto my face and proceeded to try to punch out car windows whilst leaving the parking lot. Got into my car and terrorized my poor passenger for 13 city blocks, driving on curbs and throwing up in his lap..I then forgot the gate code to my apartment complex so I left my car at the front gate, lights on, blocking the gate. 8 stitches in my head, cast on right hand..bar might be pressing charges and I may be getting evicted. But hey no DUI. Four Loko is no effing joke.
Loko: 228
Not Loko: 52

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