Drank three and a-half Four Lokos last Thursday along with going 12-0 at beer pong. Tried finishing my last Loko while I danced and made out with some girl with a purity ring. Woke up naked, sweating in her bathroom while wearing a used condom. Saw myself in the mirror while puking in her sink. Got back to bed, fucked her again and woke up in time for my 8AM Calc class. Academics first!!!