Four Loko Stories
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derp: Had a cranberry lemonade Loko and six beers, went to a dance club with my buddies, and even though I hate to dance, apparently I was tearing shit up. According to witnesses, in my flailing I ended up elbowing this girl in the head on three occasions before we left. When we got back to my friend's dorm I desperately wanted to check my email, but my laptop was in my buddy's room, which was locked. Apparently he had a girl in there, but I was unaware of anything other than the fact that my laptop was in there and I needed it right fucking then. I decided to try ramming the door with my shoulder. I ended up breaking the deadbolt out of the frame. I also ended up bursting in on my friend trying to get it on with none other than the same girl whom I had elbowed in the face earlier that night. Needless to say, she ran the hell out of there, my friend got blueballs and a busted door, and I got to check my email. All in all it worked out pretty nicely.
Loko: 159
Not Loko: 109

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